Last week, JD at Get Rich Slowly had a great post about finding the balance between time and money. As someone who’s working incredibly hard to get out of debt, I know that struggle too well. Last Saturday, I went to my hometown to visit with my parents and attend a family party. Everyone was talking about what they were doing for Easter. My grandmother asked me if I’d be coming to Easter dinner, and I sadly had to say no, I couldn’t come because I had to work.
I miss a lot of family parties. My Sunday shifts at the inn mean that I can’t attend birthday parties, or christenings, or anniversaries. I can’t go to Easter dinner. Missing these times with my family is hard. My grandparents aren’t going to be around forever, really no one will be, and it hurts to think that I’m missing spending valuable time with them now. At the same time, I don’t really have much of a choice if I want to get out of student loan debt before I’m 35. And I really, really want to get out of student loan debt by the time I’m 35.
I wish I had the financial stability to have only one job so that I could see my family whenever I wanted to. Having more than one day off per week would be nice, too. I’m still young, but all this working is starting to get to me. Not only do I work a full time job plus Sundays at the inn, but I also often pick up cover shifts for my co-workers at the inn during the week from 5-10 after I’ve already worked a full day at my other job. Not to mention the emergency phone, which starts to get busy this time of year with heating/cooling complaints; I had my first one at 12:30am this morning. It would be great to have just the full-time job, but I don’t think I can afford to do this for a few more years.
I hope I’m making the right decision, and that I haven’t died of exhaustion by that point.
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Sunday, February 8, 2009
This Weekend: Baby Shower & a Busted Shoe
This weekend I went to my parents' house on Friday night after work, then to New York for my cousin's baby shower on Saturday; it's amazing to think that the next time I see her, she'll have a sweet little baby boy in tow. I can't wait! I did spend a little more on the gift than I'd budgeted (about $15 more), but that's okay. C and I don't really exchange Valentine's Day gifts, so I'm not anticipating taking any more money out of my fun fund this month.
The shower was nice, and it was fun to spend time with the extended family. The day was pretty exhausting, though, since my mom and I left her house pretty early in the morning to drive there, and I didn't get to sleep until almost 1. Staying up late is a challenge for me even on a Saturday night, but it was definitely worth it to stay up talking to my cousin and her husband, and watching several episodes of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, one of quite a few shows they've gotten me into over the years.
On the way home today, mom and I stopped at the outlets. Knowing that we'll be doing quite a bit of outlet shopping in Florida later this month, we had no plans to even enter any of the stores we walked by in our search for the bathroom. However, as I exited the restroom, I noticed that my shoe's heel was loose.
Uh oh.
My shoe collection is pretty basic, when it comes to work-appropriate footwear: one pair of black pointed-toe heels, one pair of brown heels, and a few cheap pairs of ballet flats. That's it. I don't really do the whole shoe-crazy girl thing. I bought this particular pair of black shoes by Nine West at Marshall's in the spring of 2007, and they have served me well, but I think it might be time to replace them. Mom & I stopped in the Kenneth Cole Reaction store briefly on our way out, since I've always had good luck with their shoes, but the prices were insane. A pair of shoes I'd almost purchased in Florida last February (they didn't have my size or I would've bought them) was double the price they'd been a year ago. What on earth kind of business model is that - wait until there's a recession, then double your prices? Because we all have so much disposable income right now?? They had my size, too, but there was no way I was shelling out $80 for these shoes. Maybe I can pick them up in Florida for the "old" price. Weird.
The shower was nice, and it was fun to spend time with the extended family. The day was pretty exhausting, though, since my mom and I left her house pretty early in the morning to drive there, and I didn't get to sleep until almost 1. Staying up late is a challenge for me even on a Saturday night, but it was definitely worth it to stay up talking to my cousin and her husband, and watching several episodes of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, one of quite a few shows they've gotten me into over the years.
On the way home today, mom and I stopped at the outlets. Knowing that we'll be doing quite a bit of outlet shopping in Florida later this month, we had no plans to even enter any of the stores we walked by in our search for the bathroom. However, as I exited the restroom, I noticed that my shoe's heel was loose.
Uh oh.
My shoe collection is pretty basic, when it comes to work-appropriate footwear: one pair of black pointed-toe heels, one pair of brown heels, and a few cheap pairs of ballet flats. That's it. I don't really do the whole shoe-crazy girl thing. I bought this particular pair of black shoes by Nine West at Marshall's in the spring of 2007, and they have served me well, but I think it might be time to replace them. Mom & I stopped in the Kenneth Cole Reaction store briefly on our way out, since I've always had good luck with their shoes, but the prices were insane. A pair of shoes I'd almost purchased in Florida last February (they didn't have my size or I would've bought them) was double the price they'd been a year ago. What on earth kind of business model is that - wait until there's a recession, then double your prices? Because we all have so much disposable income right now?? They had my size, too, but there was no way I was shelling out $80 for these shoes. Maybe I can pick them up in Florida for the "old" price. Weird.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
The Grey Area of Being Financially Independent from Family
One of my favourite pf bloggers, Krystal at Give Me Back My Five Bucks, recently wrote a post responding to a comment she received about whether or not she's truly financially independent because she does things like letting her parents for dinners out and the like.
I think the commenter made a valid point about many people in our age range (post-college, mid- to late-twenties) accepting money from their parents. I've been working since I was 13 (I was a busgirl every other Saturday at a restaurant where my mom worked), and I do get annoyed by people my age who are constantly asking for or getting money from their parents to pay for things like groceries, gas, etc. That said, I hardly think that allowing your parents to pay for dinner when you go out to eat together is something for which you should be ridiculed. My parents often take me out to dinner when I visit them, and they get annoyed when I try to pay -- taking me out to dinner is something they enjoy doing, probably because they know it's a treat for me and that I appreciate it. I don't think this negates my financial independence in any way. I paid (and will be paying for the next five years, at least) my own way through college. That doesn't mean my parents haven't helped me along the way; in college, they would buy my groceries every once in a while when they visited, despite my protests. When I had to start paying down my student loans and didn't have a part-time job yet, my dad gave me $100-$200 each month for a few months to help me out. He helped my brother in the same way. I'm sure that my parents feel guilty that they weren't able to contribute to my education, and that was their way of helping out for a while until I got on my feet. I appreciated their help and accepted it as a gift, not something I felt entitled to as their daughter.
I'll admit that I go on vacation with my parents about once a year. My parents rent a house in Florida for a week or two in late February/early March most years, and I usually go to visit them for some of the time. Next month, actually, C and I are going to spend a few days with them in Florida at the house they're renting with my aunt and uncle for two weeks. We're paying for our own plane tickets, and we'll be treating everyone to dinner one of the nights we're there (and probably making dinner at least one night, too). My brother is also coming down for a few days, and so are some of my cousins. My family invited us to visit them, and we're paying our own way down there. Maybe I am spoiled, but I love spending time with my family (especially when the extended family is involved, since I so rarely see them), and I look forward to these trips. I appreciate the chance to see everyone in one place and relax without the pressures of the holidays, which are the times we're usually all together. I don't feel entitled, but grateful. My family knows this, and that's what matters.
I think the commenter made a valid point about many people in our age range (post-college, mid- to late-twenties) accepting money from their parents. I've been working since I was 13 (I was a busgirl every other Saturday at a restaurant where my mom worked), and I do get annoyed by people my age who are constantly asking for or getting money from their parents to pay for things like groceries, gas, etc. That said, I hardly think that allowing your parents to pay for dinner when you go out to eat together is something for which you should be ridiculed. My parents often take me out to dinner when I visit them, and they get annoyed when I try to pay -- taking me out to dinner is something they enjoy doing, probably because they know it's a treat for me and that I appreciate it. I don't think this negates my financial independence in any way. I paid (and will be paying for the next five years, at least) my own way through college. That doesn't mean my parents haven't helped me along the way; in college, they would buy my groceries every once in a while when they visited, despite my protests. When I had to start paying down my student loans and didn't have a part-time job yet, my dad gave me $100-$200 each month for a few months to help me out. He helped my brother in the same way. I'm sure that my parents feel guilty that they weren't able to contribute to my education, and that was their way of helping out for a while until I got on my feet. I appreciated their help and accepted it as a gift, not something I felt entitled to as their daughter.
I'll admit that I go on vacation with my parents about once a year. My parents rent a house in Florida for a week or two in late February/early March most years, and I usually go to visit them for some of the time. Next month, actually, C and I are going to spend a few days with them in Florida at the house they're renting with my aunt and uncle for two weeks. We're paying for our own plane tickets, and we'll be treating everyone to dinner one of the nights we're there (and probably making dinner at least one night, too). My brother is also coming down for a few days, and so are some of my cousins. My family invited us to visit them, and we're paying our own way down there. Maybe I am spoiled, but I love spending time with my family (especially when the extended family is involved, since I so rarely see them), and I look forward to these trips. I appreciate the chance to see everyone in one place and relax without the pressures of the holidays, which are the times we're usually all together. I don't feel entitled, but grateful. My family knows this, and that's what matters.
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